Rockin’ Steady

…except you know your team is in trouble–serious, long-term trouble–when ESPN’s “Outside The Lines”–usually a showcase for “issues” journalism on topics like steroids and the police blotter–dedicates a segment to them.

I will refrain on commenting on this monstrosity for a while. For now, I will devote the blog to other flights of fancy. Today: How to beat a transit ticket for unsafe riding. (I recently got ticketed for “riding between cars”, which has become a popular way for the MTA and its finest to run warrant checks on random people–even good looking ones wearing suits).
1. Challenge every ticket.
2. Show up at transit court to challenge the ticket.
3. Demand an adjournment so as to get the opportunity to confront your accuser (the cop who wrote your ticket), as is your constitutional right.
4. Show up on the rescheduled date. By this time, weeks will have passed (especially since you showed up for the first date). There may no longer be quota implications for your accuser; not sure how that works. But the more time has passed, the less likely it is that your accuser will show up. Your accuser must seriously ask himself whether it’s worth it to trek all the way to Fulton Mall in Brooklyn to preserve the “get.”
5. Win by default when your accuser doesn’t show up. No $75 fine for you!
6. If your accuser does show up, attack the face of the ticket. Any inaccuracy could result in the ticket being dismissed, and the administrative judges love having a nice, neat solution.

There. The Knicks may be both pathetic and apathetic, but I’ll make something good of this blog yet.